23 Things That I Can Do As A Young Married Woman

     So, I posted the other day a response to the article titled "23 Things To Do Instead Of Getting Engaged Before You're 23." Which, was nothing but a big fat puddle of ignorance, but anyhow... I've been muddling up some responses to her list in specific which I really didn't specifically hit on in my previous post. That's because my thoughts have been brewing.

Here's Her List: (My Responses are in Red)

Please enjoy these 23 things to do instead of getting engaged before you're 23.
Please get over yourself and realize that you can have 2x the fun (which I do) with my spouse at 20.

1.) Get a passport.
     Woah! Guess what?! My husband and I are actually getting our passports together... Would you believe you're allowed to get a passport and travel after you get married?? Now we can travel and make memories together which excites me more than a big long trip by myself would. 

2.) Find your "thing"
     This is a funny one. I've found lots of "things" and I'll probably be finding more "things" until the day I die. My husband probably will, too. We have lots of "things" together as well. Quite frankly if I would've found a "thing" and just decided that was going to be my only "thing" for the rest of my life, I would be quite bored. 

3.) Make out with a stranger.
     I'd much rather make out with the same man I come home to everyday. But hey, that's just me. 

4.) Adopt a pet.
     Another good one... I adopted a pet before I met my husband and it went horribly. I had to find it another good home because I just simply wasn't able to take care of him. After my husband and I moved this past fall, we adopted a dog together and it's going wonderfully. Now there's two people to love and take care of the puppy and it's much, much easier. Funny how things work out... 

How cute is he?

5.) Start a band.
     Not interested, at all. But, if I did I have my husband to be a band member. 

6.) Make a cake. Make a second cake. Have your cake and eat it too.
     If you haven't made a cake and you're any bit over the age of like, 16 I'm concerned for you. Don't all girls bake cakes? This one was just weird. I bake more now that I'm married, I eat my own cake, too. My husband enjoys it a lot. Cake is good. 

7.) Get a tattoo. It's more permanent than a marriage.
     I already have 3 of them, and while they're permanent my marriage is also. Whether or not you choose to believe that is up to you. Then again, tattoos can be removed, can't they? It's a long a messy process though, similar to the long and messy process of a divorce.. 

8.) Explore a new religion.
     Neither my husband nor myself are too incredibly religious, but if we chose to be, we'd probably explore the religion together and take advantage of being able to learn new things. 

9.) Start a small business.
     I've always dreamed of opening up my own bakery and funny enough, my husband is a business major. I'm a Psychology major, so I don't know the business end of things. Guess he'll have to help me out. I would really hate to get into the mess of opening a business by myself, anyhow. 

10.) Cut your hair.
     So you can't get a haircut once you're married? Weird. I get my hair cut all of the time. I even DYE it too. Ballsy, huh? My husband gets haircuts as well. I guess we're living on the edge. 

11.) Date two people at once and see how long it takes to blow up in your face.
     I'm not even going to respond to this, aside from asking why in the hell you would ever want to do this to yourself, let alone two innocent guys? I'm content with being married to one man. 

12.) Build something with your hands.
     How is this relevant to being single??? Oh wait, it's not just like basically all of the rest of this list. You can build shit with your hands when you're married too. Projects tend to go faster when there's two people working on them-just saying. 

13.) Accomplish a Pinterest project.
     I love Pinterest. I loved it before I was married and I love it even more now. It's awesome having my husband around to help me out with some of the more technical/constructive stuff that I'm simply not that great at. 

14.) Join the Peace Corps.
     Eh, not my thing. Again though, I could if I wanted to even now that I'm married... 

15.) Disappoint your parents.
     I did that enough in high school while I was doing my "teenage" stuff. I'd rather not do it anymore. 

16.) Watch GIRLS, over and over again.
     I like American Horror Story and The Walking Dead more. 

17.) Eat a jar of Nutella in one sitting.
     I can't do that now, why? Oh right, I can. I love Nutella and I eat it all the time. I even make Nutella cupcakes. Yummy :) 

18.) Make strangers feel uncomfortable in public places.
     First of all, I don't enjoy being extremely rude to people I don't even know. Second of all, I'm sure a little obnoxious PDA with my spouse would make people feel uncomfortable in a split second. 

19.) Sign up for Crossfit.
     My husband and I are actually signing up in the spring. Working out alone has always been difficult for me to do, because I don't feel motivated. We started going to the gym together and it makes a huge difference for the both of us. Amazing what a strong relationship can transfer to when it comes to physical fitness. 

20.) Hang out naked in front of a window.
     Nope, no thanks. I'm not a fan of public nudity. 

21.) Write your feelings down in a blog.
     Isn't that what I'm doing right now?

22.) Be selfish.
     I did plenty of that while I was growing up and while it was kind of nice sometimes, I must say it got me into a lot of trouble, too. Being selfish when it came to me vs my parents, or anything like that, always resulted in a nice grounding. Now, I always think of we or us not I and I enjoy it a lot more. The most selfish I am now, is getting my mani and pedi every so often. That's about as selfish as I desire to be. 

23.) Come with me to the Philippines for Chinese New Year.
     I have absolutely no desire to hang out with you. Sorry! (Or as you said in your blog Sorry not Sorry!)

Here's my list of 10 things that you should focus on before you turn 23, regardless of being married or single: 

1) Find the love and respect you have inside for yourself, before you go looking for it from anyone else. Trust me that once you love and respect yourself, and then find the man who does the same, it'll change your life forever. 

2) Do well in school and find a career or a college path that you will be happy in, don't seek the money. Money is great and it surely makes life a little easier in some aspects but you're not gonna be happy sitting in a cubicle all day if your real passion is baking. Follow your heart, not the cash. 

3) Remember that when it comes to your friends, it's about the quality not quantity. They come and go. I'm hardly friends with anyone I graduated high school with and my best friends now are 4-5 years older than me with college degrees. They're also the best and most amazing friends I could ever ask for. Age doesn't necessarily matter, but when your friends are only worried about getting hammered and you're starting to realize that there's more to life-maybe it's time to move on. 

4) Save, save, save!!!!!!! I made this mistake and didn't save much of anything at all. I learned the hard way, but I cannot stress enough that saving-as much as we may hate it-comes around to help you in the end. Come up with a plan to save a certain amount every week or every paycheck. Keep it on a calendar to keep yourself on track with it. 

5) Don't settle when it comes to men/women. If you think to yourself, "Is it okay for him/her to be treating me like this?" Then, you really need to reevaluate things. If you're being physically, sexually or mentally abused, please get out. Please. Asking for help can be scary but there are so many resources out there. 

6) Spend time with your family. I know how crazy they can drive us. They annoy us, piss us off and make us want to scream but the older I get, the more I realize how important it is to make memories while everyone (especially the elders) before they're gone. It means a lot to them too, trust me. 

7) Don't be a cheater or a cheatee. You will get caught if you cheat, accept it. Also, if someone wants you to hook up and you know they're in a relationship, just don't do it. Because, you will get caught. 

8) Eat the extra cookie. Who's watching? :)

9) Don't take on the responsibility of a pet until you know you've got the time and money to do so. Not only will it stress you out, but it's totally unfair to the animal. 

10) Don't let anyone tell you that you're wrong for being single until you're 30 or that you're an idiot for being married before you're 23. If your friends are being weird about you being in a relationship or being engaged, and they're single.. Unless they're concerned for your safety because it's an abusive relationship, 9 times out of 10 it's jealous. Just remember, it's your life. 


     Here's what I'm getting at... There are two sides to everything. Well, three. Your side, my side and the truth. I just don't understand how that list of 23 things, could truly be what you would want to accomplish before you're 23. Hell, if I made that list my list of goals or things I wanted to make sure I did and really focused on completing those, I wouldn't be too far. I've learned to value love and self respect and my family more than being a cheater or making out with strangers. Granted, it's taken time to find myself and I'm still doing that. I've made a million mistakes and I'll continue to make them for the rest of my life. Mistakes are okay. Being single is okay. Getting married when you want to, no matter how old you are is okay. Just hear me out when I say that getting married doesn't ruin your life. If the author of that article truly believed in herself and what she was saying, the bitter undertone wouldn't exist in it. There's no superiority when it comes to married life or single life. 

     Maybe you don't care what I have to say, and that's fine. Maybe you think that I'm bashing being single and I'm just trying to talk out of my behind to cover up that I'm secretly miserable and I'm trying to prove myself otherwise and that's perfectly alright, too. I'm in love, and before I found love boy did I do some soul searching. I found myself, I learned how to love and respect myself. Doing that was so much more important than most of that list. Mind you, I did do several of the things on that list before I got married, but I can do those same things now that I am married. I didn't write my life away on my marriage certificate. I signed my name on a piece of paper that means absolutely everything to me. I get to spend the rest of my life with a man so amazing I didn't know people like him existed. I get to spend even longer with him, because we are so young.


xoxo Taylor